The Importance Of Having A Handy Partner

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Growing up, my parents and siblings didn’t know how to do ONE practical thing.

At home, if a bulb burned out, the car battery died, or the oven was unplugged, we needed to call a handy man to fix it. No way around it. In one of our many family car trips, we got a flat tire… my dad and older brother took 2 hours to change that tire! 2 whole hours. 120 minutes. TRUE STORY! Taking that long to change a tire doesn’t only mean that you are unpractical, but that if the end of the world should come, you are guaranteed to die within seconds.

In a way, being surrounded by a bunch of useless people in your childhood is a blessing in disguise because once you have lived life with a handy partner there is no going back – it becomes a Tinder requirement.

Hence, George enters the scene.

jestcafe.com-handyman1When I met George 15 years ago (holy smokes. That is a 1 and a 5 next to each other), I was impressed. Aside from changing bulbs, charging batteries and plugging appliances, the guy fixed his own cars, repaired all his gadgets and changed tires in less than 3 minutes. Can you believe that? This is huge for those of us unschooled in functional activities.

Now that 15 years have passed, I am seriously spoiled and dependant on this man that repairs and builds whatever he feels like.

Now, don’t get me wrong. George has many faults but those have been overlooked thanks to this one advantage. Every time I have a foot out the door, I am reminded about the end of world being near and my only chance of survival being that man that I am trying to leave behind… which makes me wonder: how do people survive with partners that are not handy? When stuff breaks in the house, who fixes it? When you buy a vintage lamp that doesn’t turn on, who mends it? When you have to install wallpaper in your kids’ room, who does it?

It is a luxury to walk around a flea market, see whatever old piece you wish, and know you have this guy at home that can repair it. My kids, for example, blindly believe that George would fix their toys no matter the damage they inflict on them, and he does, except for that plastic train toy they tore into pieces and then flushed down the toilet. One thing is to be a handy man; another one is to be God.

jestcafe.com-handyman5This is the Halloween robot costume that George did for the kids. Lights, switches, and a robot voice transformer included. Very sweet, don’t you think?

jestcafe.com-handyman2 Here is a photo of George with Victor doing their famous standup trick. Victor was only 7 months. This is not handy, but pretty adorable.

How about you? Do you have somebody handy in your life? If not, how do you solve daily problems like a broken washing machine or a dead battery? Would love to hear.

 

Also, a post about being called after your husband’s name, how many kids is enough, and, camping in Idyllwild.

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What kind of friends do you have?

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The other day, I found myself thinking about which traits my friends have in common. I have a lot of good friends, and I was wondering if I have a tendency to choose the same kind of people as my friends or if their personalities are all over the place.

After thinking about it for a while, I realized that my friends do have some things in common. Here they are: 1) a good sense of humor (I make fun of them a lot); 2) strong (I make fun of them a lot); and 3) easiness (I make fun of them a lot).  I don’t like D-R-A-M-A, and I like to laugh, and my friends are like that too.

I also like people that are easy going and self-deprecating. I like people that don’t get mad if I forget to call them on their birthday (though I rarely do), or if I can’t make it to a dinner once in a while. My point is that I don’t like to worry about my friends getting mad at me. Easy! Just be easy, please.

On this vein, I am also aware of the kind of people that don’t love me, and that would be very sensitive people.  I have to be very careful with people that have a gentle soul because it is easy for me to hurt their feelings as I don’t have a gentle soul myself.

I am getting better as I get older, and I try to be compassionate around those who are more sensitive than me, but it is hard! I have a lot of siblings, so I was raised in the jungle! I had to fight for everything, and when I say fight, I mean blood, tackles and punches – not for the faintest of heart.

What about you? Do you look for similar traits among your friends? or, are you more tolerant than me? I would love to hear.

Image Source Crush Cul De Sac

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Life Lately, March 2016

jestcafe.com-lifelately23 We went skiing to Big Bear back in January. It was the first time for Víctor and Max, and they both loved it. How could they not? There was plenty of snow and 60 degrees weather… only in California.

Max just turned 2 in October, so I didn’t think he would be able to go skiing. It was my brother, a ski instructor, the one that recommended taking him, and he was right. George and I are good skiers, so it was easy to carry Max between our legs. He was not able to ski on his own, but he still enjoyed the whole things as much as Víctor did. The best part was that we didn’t need a babysitter! We were able to ski all day together as a family.

From all the ski centers we went to, we liked skiing at Snow Valley the best. It is a smaller mountain, easy to access and with no lift lines. It is perfect when you are skiing with small children that need to go to the bathroom (or take a break) at any moment in time. jestcafe.com-lifelately22 jestcafe.com-lifelately21 jestcafe.com-lifelately20 jestcafe.com-lifelately18jestcafe.com-lifelately11Look at this little one on his mini-skies! People were so surprised to see him going down the mountain with us. He is a tiny creature! He was, without a doubt, the youngest kid on the mountain that weekend. jestcafe.com-lifelately9And here he is in the middle of Snow Summit mountain… totally exhausted. jestcafe.com-lifelately2jestcafe.com-lifelately12A well deserved meal. I have never seen my kids eat so much.jestcafe.com-lifelately19jestcafe.com-lifelately8jestcafe.com-lifelately14 Big Bear Village is a cute little town with nice restaurants and coffee shops. After spending the day skiing, it was fun to go there to have dinner and relax a little bit.
jestcafe.com-lifelately7jestcafe.com-lifelately5jestcafe.com-lifelately3jestcafe.com-lifelately16Max couldn’t make it through dinner. ha!
jestcafe.com-lifelately17jestcafe.com-lifelately13jestcafe.com-lifelately15 jestcafe.com-lifelately1Back in LA,  Max’s favorite hobby is eating ice cream. jestcafe.com--lifelately50 This is a picture of Salt & Straw, one the best creameries on the west side.
jestcafe.com--lifelately49 Hi there, Víctor!jestcafe.com--lifelately44 Did I mention Max can read? Not really, but he looks super smart here.
jestcafe.com--lifelately47I found this picture of George when he was 25 years old, so very cute, and he still has that jacket!!jestcafe.com--lifelately45George and my friend’s son, baby Andrew!
jestcafe.com--lifelately55 As some of you know, I have been obsessed with the Flower Market in DTLA. I have been there almost every weekend for the last 2 months. I know the vendors, the flowers, the smell. I love it so much, I am always finding new excuses to go.
jestcafe.com--lifelately54 jestcafe.com--lifelately53 jestcafe.com--lifelately52 jestcafe.com--lifelately56jestcafe.com--lifelately51jestcafe.com-lifelately36Hey, Max!
jestcafe.com-lifelately35 Victor being very helpful – decorating for Easter.jestcafe.com-lifelately34 jestcafe.com-lifelately33 More ice cream!!!  and filthy children. jestcafe.com-lifelately32There are a lot of hugs and kisses going around in our house.
jestcafe.com-lifelately31 Here is me trying to take a picture for my profile. George thinks is too cold. I kind of agree so I am just posting it here. Also, as you can see, I am not a fan of makeup. jestcafe.com-lifelately30 jestcafe.com-lifelately27 Eating at Maple Block Meat, the best meat restaurant in Culver City. It is just excellent.jestcafe.com-lifelately26 Max and I spending our Tuesdays together.jestcafe.com-lifelately25Having brunch at S + W Country Diner in Culver City. This place is so good it gets crowded 10 minutes after opening. You need to be there early! BONUS: Lots of  toys for kids to play with. Perfect!jestcafe.com-lifelately24 jestcafe.com--lifelately41 My friend Sarah celebrated her birthday at the Commissary in the Line Hotel. We had brunch with friends in this gorgeous place. It was fun! and the only hip thing I have done in the last 3 months, so I am sharing it here. jestcafe.com--lifelately40 Another proof that I am not into makeup. jestcafe.com--lifelately42My favorite part of the Commissary was the mismatch-vintage dinnerware they have. Look at this beautiful coffee cup I got!jestcafe.com--lifelately39Hope you enjoyed the photos! Have a wonderful day!

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That Flower Arrangement Workshop

jestcafe.com-flowerarrangement-workshop-48 As I mentioned before in this post, I decided to start doing DIY workshops for friends. The wreath-making party we did last December was so much fun that I wanted to repeat it, so my friend Charlene and I decided to do a flower arrangement workshop and it was perfect. jestcafe.com-flowerarrangement-workshop47 We met the weekend before to go to the flower market in DTLA to see what was in season. We bought a lot of flowers and created this arrangement:
jestcafe.com-flowerarrangement-workshop-49Cute, don’t you think?

The idea was to try and copy it, while giving tips in the process.

We invited 10 friends to the workshop and got the flowers, clippers, vases, and wet foam blocks. At the end of the day, each one of us took their own arrangement home.

Everybody contributed some money and brought food to the gathering. I went to the flower market the day before to get all the flower supplies. On Sunday we set up and everybody came over at 11 am for brunch and DIY fun. It was amazing!
jestcafe.com-flowerarrangementworkshop1jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop9jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop10Ranunculus galore!jestcafe.com-flowerarrangementworkshop5 jestcafe.com-flowerarrangementworkshop4jestcafe.com-flowerarrangementworkshop7jestcafe.com-flower-arrangement-workshop47These two rascals getting into those foam blocks before the workshop started:jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop8 jestcafe.com-flowerarrangementworkshop6 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop11jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop16 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop15 My beautiful friend Charlene taught the workshop. She has a special gift for finding beauty in everything she does:
jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop14jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop13 We wanted to use edibles in the arrangement, so we bought kumquats. For flowers, we got pincushions ranunculus and anemones. We found that 2-3 pincushions, 5 ranunculus and 2 anemones was enough for a frontal arrangement. Everybody ended up using more flowers because they decided to do centerpieces that could be viewed from all sides, this meant that a lot of people ended up cutting greens and flowers from my garden to be able to fill up the whole vase! That was probably the best part: foraging for beauty. Here are more pictures:jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop12jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop17jestcafe.com-flowerarrangementworkshop2jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop18 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop20jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop19 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop21jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop26 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop25 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop37jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop24 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop23 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop22jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop27 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop31 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop30 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop28jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop29
jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop32jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop34 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop33It is unusual to have these kind of meetings for friends. I think that is the reason why everybody was so happy to participate in this workshop. It is nice to do something different that is DIY related, don’t you think?

Originally, we wanted everybody to do asymmetrical and organic arrangements, but, in the end, everybody took their own creative path and followed their own vision. Here are the results:jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop35jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop43jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop38 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop46 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop44jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop45 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop42 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop41 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop40 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop39 jestcafe.com-flowerworkshop36The end.

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On Death And Grief

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Something very sad happened last Sunday. My sweet, smart and incredible father-in-law passed away.

I have never experienced the death of someone so dear to me before, so this week has been a constant mix of new emotions. I have learned that when somebody you love dies, a veil of unhappiness starts covering all aspects of your life. Sometimes this veil is lifted by a conversation, a joke or daily life chores, but eventually it settles back again into your heart and you find yourself crying when in the shower, when looking out the window, or when sitting down on the couch after putting your kids to sleep.

The grief comes in strong waves, and you can’t stop wishing to get one more hug from the one you lost before he goes into a world that you can’t touch or feel.

A week before dying, Bill had a stroke. We all rushed to his side and were able to say goodbye. I told him how much I loved him. He grabbed my hand strongly. He heard me, I know it. I don’t have any pending issues with him. I loved him, he loved me, but thinking my world won’t have his active presence anymore is a sorrow I can’t bear easily.

I never thought I would be so affected by this. I have never experienced this kind of sadness. When I go about my day, his smiling image appears in my heart with those blue eyes that were always curious and happy, and grief sets in. There is no escaping from it.

Death is absolute. A life penance that must be endured. A reminder of your own mortality. It arises important questions about your own life and how you are living it and, in this sense, it can be a rebirth.

Maybe one day I will be able to transform this sadness into positive, but now, today, I can’t. I think about his hands, his face, his voice. I think about our conversations and our time together. I think about how much I miss him, and I cry, because, right now, there is nothing else to do.

Bye, Bill. I love you so and I wish you were still here. I wish it every day.

 

A couple of months ago I asked Bill some personal questions about old age and death. Here are his answers. In that post you can also read a little bit more about the amazing life this man had.

 

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